A
young Japanese got married a day before his birthday and
went on a honeymoon.
In the middle of the night the telephone rang. It was
his mother, wishing him a happy birthday.
A bit peeved, he politely thanked her but asked
"why she had disturbed him at
three in the morning."
Well you disturbed me at three in the morning twenty-six
years ago," she replied sweetly. |
A
Chinese immigrant to the US, went to his bank and had a
remittance sent to
his poor relations in the old country. A month
later he went again to send another remittance
but was shocked that the amount remitted was a little
less than the previous month.
He angrily berated the bank teller who
nonchalantly shrugged his shoulders
and said... "Fluctuations." (which he heard
as...fluck you Asians).
The furious Chinaman retorted..."Fluck you bloody
Americans." |
An
Indian immigrant in the Gulf took his first pay cheque
to a British bank for
encashment. The teller politely
said..."Please sign the back of the cheque
sir."
"No...No..." said the migrant worker, "I
have been told never to sign anything."
"Well, said the teller, those are the rules and if
you do not sign, I'm afraid
I cannot cash your cheque."
"Then I will try the American bank."
"Certainly Sir, but I assure you that the rules are
the same."
At the American bank, the teller brusquely snapped...
"Sign the back."
The migrant protested as before...to receive three sharp
slaps and the curt order..."Sign the back."
The next month, the migrant went back to the British
bank and presented the cheque
and quite obligingly signed the back. While counting out
the notes the teller
inquired..."Did the American bank cash your cheque
last time ?"
"yes" said the migrant
"But didn't they insist that you sign the back
?"
"yes. But you see , he expained it much better
." |
After
the seven-days war, the relations between Egypt
and Russia became very strained.
One of the issues of contention was the design of the
tank that Egypt wanted
to build with Soviet technology. The Egyptians were
insisting that the gearbox
was not acceptable and they wanted one with one forward
gear and four reverse gears. |
Three
inebriated village yokels were bruised and battered
after a collision with a
truck. They were lucky to be alive. Charanjit tried to
explain... "You see I was
driving on the road last night when I saw two lights
coming towards me.
I told Chittajit who was sitting behind me, that I would
frighten the two bloody
scooterists by driving between them." |
A
wave of "Ajit stories" have recently become
the rage among Hindi-speaking
communities around the world. A Hindi film villan called
Ajit had developed a unique style
of Hindish or Anglo-Hindi humour where he would deliver
an idiomised one-liner, twisting
some English concept.
One such concerns his
trusty lieutenant Robert (pronounced Raabert and
actually Ravat).
The advent of Star TV revolutionised the lives of
many like Ravat who began
swaggering around like a film star and calling himself
Robert.
One day he met his friend Ajit and said he was
going to Hollywood to become a star.
Ajit soon put him in his place by
saying..."Why go to Hollywood ? Just stand
on top of the Red Fort and you will become Ravat Redfort.
In another tale, his
pretty secretary Mona, was thrilled with the film Amar,
Akbar, Anthony.
She gushed to Ajit that she was going to find an
Anthony and marry him.
Ajit soon dampened her ardour by saying... "Darrling
if you
marry this Tony... your marriage will be mona
tony." |
